Love how this works so well at both the audible and visual levels the two complementing each other the breathlessness of the unpunctuated run-on lines punctuated by the rhythmical shifts of the varying line-lengths creating these polyrhythmic cross-rhythms mirroring the wavering between the sense of relentless onrush and sense of suspense, the intense violent outburst between the silence of anticipation and aftermath.
That first line! Wow 😮 It’s an ordinary activity but the assonance with the “o” sound makes it intriguing and intense. I can feel the storm approaching before it arrives.
This hits hard for someone who's been through hurricanes and tgeir aftermath in several different states and countries. The violence is so short. The aftermath is so long.
Love how this works so well at both the audible and visual levels the two complementing each other the breathlessness of the unpunctuated run-on lines punctuated by the rhythmical shifts of the varying line-lengths creating these polyrhythmic cross-rhythms mirroring the wavering between the sense of relentless onrush and sense of suspense, the intense violent outburst between the silence of anticipation and aftermath.
Wow. This is an amazing poem the last lines are truly chilling.
Hooked from the first line.
That first line! Wow 😮 It’s an ordinary activity but the assonance with the “o” sound makes it intriguing and intense. I can feel the storm approaching before it arrives.
🥁
🙌🏽
Beautifully written poem with deeper implications than the immediate aftermath of hurricanes. The spacial form works beautifully.
Thank you ❤️🔥
Awesome poem 🙌🏻🙌🏻 love the creative formatting! Congrats on your publication here, friend 🔥
Thank you Alex!!!
This hits hard for someone who's been through hurricanes and tgeir aftermath in several different states and countries. The violence is so short. The aftermath is so long.
Nice poem. Would prefer the ending be no one’s screaming
bc they’ve been saved
I think I would prefer that ending too (in real life) but it doesn’t match up with my experiences.
It’s a double entendre