For the Man with the Erection Lasting More than Four Hours by John Hodgen
"Silver, walking his own plank. He has science to thank."
For the Man with the Erection Lasting More than Four Hours
by John Hodgen
He’s supposed to call his doctor, but for now he’s the May King with his own maypole. He’s hallelujah. He’s glory hole. The world has more women than he can shake a stick at. The world is his brickbat, no conscience to prick at, all of us Germans he can ich liebe dich at. He’s Dick and Jane. He’s Citizen Kane. He’s Bob Dole. He’s Peter the Great. He’s a tsar. He’s a clown car with an extra car. Funiculì, Funiculà. He’s an organ donor. He works pro boner. He’s folderol. He’s fiddlesticks. He’s the light left on at Motel 6. He’s free-for-alls. He’s Viagra Falls. He’s bangers and mash. He’s balderdash. He’s a wanker. He’s got his own anchor. He’s whack-a-doodle. King Canoodle. He’s a pirate, Long John Silver, walking his own plank. He has science to thank. He’s in like Flynn. He’s Gunga Din, holding his breath, cock of the walk through the valley of the shadow of death. He’s Icarus, hickory dickerous, the mouse run up the clock. He’s shock and awe. He’s Arkansas. He’s the package, the deal, the Good Housekeeping Seal. He’s Johnson & Johnson. He’s a god now, the talk of the town. He’s got no place to go but down.
Originally published in Poetry (July/August 2009)






Now this one is definitely worth a big fat 10/10.
Speaking as a feminist, you know.
Actually, scrap that. This goes to eleven.
Oh, thank you for posting this. I needed a good laugh. What wit!!